=X

i am scared. i am stress. i am feeling incompetent. i have no confidence in tmr's stuff. i am pessismistic for the FIRST TIME ever in my near 2 decades of life. bleah.

heck... gonna just do MY THING and pray and hope.

Hmmn... just a lil news to share with u guys.. as u all know that i am gonna head in the direction of working as a PR in the media industry or advertising company in future... and my interesting lecturer actually came up with a MEDIA name for me.

CASSANDRA LEONG!

hehe.. i kinda love it... my class kinda love it...any feedbacks?
Cassandra originates from that of a Trojan Princess and it also means 'she who entangles her men'
haha.. note..its MEN.. not MAN.

And my teacher think that it kinda suits me... according to her, she says its a name thats strong, loud, wild and with CHARACTER. haha. okie... i didnt know that i do give ppl this kinda impression. Actually i can just be ur sweet little shy darling... muahaha.. i'm not a meanie all the time. lalala.

haiz.. i am so fatigue from the pressure i am giving myself academically. Yet theres nothing i can do about it. One thing for sure, i hate ppl to tell/persuade me to do things after i have stated uncountable times that its against my wishes. I have my reasons dude...

i know whats important to me... and maybe i am just a v.difficult person to be with at times, cos i expect alot from myself and it ends up affecting the ppl around me. And maybe i am just plain stubborn... the more a person fights to get my attention, i more i will refuse and drift away UNLESS its a mutual feeling. After so many hints that there is no possibility for any progress... i just dun understand y some ppl just dun get it...

Its scary ya know... of cos i love ALL my frens.. its unquestionable. BUT when this particular someone just tries too hard n ends up making me feeling that he is possessive..i mean i have my own freedom to choose who i wanna go out with during my free time and what kind of people i would love to spend time with in my social circle. I dun need anyone to advise me about it and to inform my whereabouts to UNLESS i am attached to u... or else seriously its v.irritating.

i have been trying to be v.tactful with this person who has always been there for me.. and i am really sincerely v.grateful for that... But sometimes, gratitudes aside, there is always a fine line between friendship and our own privacy. i think the respect for personal space is v.important.

Sometimes keeping a suitable distant from each other is more appealing at least in my opinion... being less pushy and giving each other time works better. At least it wun kill all the mystery and possibility for something to develop between u and the opposite gender. dun ya agree?

When the time is ripe..naturally everything will fall into place i assume.
I value the importance of chemistry in a r/s. The main reason being..its either u and i share it, or simply dun.

And i am really sorry to give the impression that i am a lil cold. Cos there are times when i love spending time alone to sort my tots out...this is an important ritual for me.

And NOPE i am not turning away love. i dislike it when this someone just tries to act as though he reads my mind.

I want to be loved. I love companionship. I treasure the blooming passion and intimacy that a couple share. Most importantly, i must be able to love u as well. Cos its always a 2 way ticket.

I am not that difficult to love, impress or pursuit ya noe?
Under that strong facade thats filled with personality as some ppl perceive, i am still an ordinary gal doing her thing.

hmmn... enough of rants.. will brb for vday updates.
*Angel and Mortal*

hehe.

Luckily this blog is safely guarded by the password... no worries, i am just grumbling n whatever mentioned above is in no relation with u peeps who have access to this precious blog. hehe.

take care.... the bottomline of my life is not only all about achievements but the celebration of LOVE, PASSION and HAPPINESS. I'm a typical Cancerian afterall. =)